Scenes from Summer

Make Believe



There was an article on kids and make believe in yesterday's USA Today. The article says that make-believe "is vital for kids to conquer fears, explore hopes and dreams, and where they can initiate action instead of just constantly reacting". Of course this creative play is diminishing because of electronic media and toys that follow scrips and don't require kids to engage in the play. The article stated that a good toy is 90% kid and 10% toy. In our experience I find this to be true. The only toys that all my kids continue to play with regardless of age difference are the play kitchen, cars, wooden blocks, and figurines of people. I enjoyed the article and was encouraged by it because my kids are imagination wizards. This summer so far they have successfully turned their room into an airport, bookstore, restaurant, bank, and hotel. I too had an active imagination when I was growing up. I always attributed it to the fact that my parents didn't play with us. They loved us, took care of us but they were not the type of parents that got down on the floor and played with us. So I learned how to entertain myself. I read a lot, but mostly, my sisters and I used our imagination. We built haunted houses, played school, office and house. We started imaginary businesses and even performed routines we made up. All this served me well, I rarely need others to feel entertained, I have no problems being alone and I pride myself on being able to find unique ways of figuring things out on my own. Now I'm the parent and I am usually on the floor with my kids but I don't ever initiate or lead the play, rather I like to see how they figure how things work, or how they see things it is sometimes different and new. I am there to play along once my kid show me how they want it played. So I am the customer, the frequent flier, the student, the diner and never the pilot or the teacher or the chef because then they would just follow my script instead of inventing their own.

Not to say I always relinquish the lead in play, just last night, I thought it would be "fun" to have a fancy dinner. So I set the table with my finest white linens, wine glasses, and candles. The kids loved it. Camryn even wore a sport coat. We lingered at the table a bit longer than usual and we all used our best manners. Make-believe can turn the most common situations into great fun.

It's funny how you think your parents made so many mistakes until you become a parent too and you realize that maybe they didn't do such a bad job after all.

Whacha doin'?

I have absolutely no idea what to write about today, I just don't want that last post to be the first thing I see anymore. The kids made it back safe and sound all they needed was a shower, toothbrush and a good nights rest to be back to normal. Apparently, they only had chlorine baths while in Philly...Hey in defense of Tita and Jaja, it is summer after all.
So we are leaving for Buffalo next Wednesday and we are so excited. It is so hard to believe that it has been 2 years since we left. I am most excited to just spend time with family. I don't care where in the world we are. This trip has been a year in the making so it is exciting to see it so close at hand.

The weather here has been rainy and wet. Everyday (around nap time if we are lucky) the sky gets dark, the thunder rolls in and the rain pours down. My plants have never looked better, and our grass is beautiful. When I feel like complaining about all the rain I remind myself of all the people in the Midwest and all the flooding they are experiencing. What a force of nature the weather is. In our Churches here in South Florida, we pray for an easy hurricane season. I hope the churches pray for the weather in their areas as well. Add it to the ever growing long list of things to pray for these days. There are so many things and people to pray for you could almost be in prayer all day. But that is what God wants after all, for us to be in constant prayer with him.

Have you noticed a change in habits due to the rising gas prices? I have been obsessed with gas prices for years. Doug always teased me about it when I would talk to him about it. And now look, everyone is talking about it! Doug who never cared about where he filled up at now goes to the pumps I have shown him have the lowest price. The other day I went to fill up, I was on the Empty and the gas light was on. I got to the pump after waiting in line, sweating that I would run out of gas and I looked in my purse for my card. Nowhere! Now I dumped my purse out on the seat and tore through everything, no card. I am really sweating now. No card, empty tank and only 1o dollars in my purse.

I was embarrassed to say to the cashier, "$10 on pump 11". Because that is like what, 2 gallons? So I went back to the pump and put in my 10 dollars. Guess what it didn't even turn that gas light off. I drove back home and found my card (on the desk where I left it after a night of shopping online). I remember the not so distant day when 10 dollars yielded me over a half tank.
These days, I am opting to shop online rather than drive to the stores. I bulk all my errands into one marathon trip, and there are many days I entertain the kids at home rather than drive some place.

Well, I better go nice chatting with you but I can't ignore the dishes in my sink or my kids for any longer!

Last night I had the most disturbing dream. Our entire house was aglow in orange light. I looked outside and noticed the sky was orange with red circles. I ran outside to get a better look and it was eerily bright lit up bu the red circles. Of course I was only with the younger two, my older two were with Doug and I immediately felt very concerned that we weren't all together. I searched the field for Doug's golf cart and saw them heading toward home. I felt a relief, but as we all started to run inside, we got struck by white beams of light. I woke up at this point startled and disturbed. How funny this seems now, as I write about it. But last night I was positively frightened by it.

I know exactly what it means, this morning I put my two older kids on a plane to Philly. Cade is playing in a lacrosse tournament and Camryn went for the ride. They were meeting Tita and Jaja there, but had to fly there alone first. I know that I had anxiety about this. Deep down my subconscious was working out the fear I have of being separated from my children. In my dream they were not with me during the cataclysmic time and that was what made it a nightmare, the world was not right and they were not with me. Or maybe it was the other way around. My biggest fear truly.

They made it to Philly safely, I am relieved to report and couldn't be in more capable hands with Tita and Jaja, but as their mother I realize I may never sleep a decent night when they are not with me.
There is no better time than when we are all together. I need to remember that and remind myself when they are on my last nerve fighting with each other. When we are together it feels like all the pieces are assembled and no matter what happens as long as we are together we will be alright.

To say it is too quiet around here is an understatement. It is awful. I miss all the fun we have just hanging out on any given night. Just last night we were all dancing to High School Musical and having a ball. And tonite, I can hear the crickets chirp.

I am going to be a wreck when Cade goes to college....Lord help me.

“The greatest exercise of the human heart is to bend down and pick someone up.” Tim Russert

I have been one of those people saddened and glued to the TV for all the coverage of the sudden death of Tim Russert. I didn't know him personally, I just knew of him. I watched him on Meet the Press on Sunday's because it was the only place that all the events of the week became simple and easy for me to understand. I remember when we lived in Buffalo, his face on the news was familiar because he did come home a lot and he did a lot for Buffalo. His beginnings were like so many people from Buffalo. His life and family echoed the lives and families that live there still. Parents who were hard working, loyal to their Catholic faith, good people and devoted to their families. Doug's family is like this. So many families in Buffalo are like this. Salt of the Earth people, and that made a big impression on me while we lived there.
After watching all the coverage and hearing so much more about this man that was so likable already, I am holding onto Mr. Russert's sincere service to others in deeds, words, actions and most of all in example. Rest in Peace Mr. Russert now that you are home with your heavenly father.

He's not a businessman, he's a business, man

A father's day tribute





I can't take credit for that line, a rapper came up with it, though his name escapes me at the moment. I haven't been tuning into the rap stations, NPR was doing a story on rap moguls and their ability to market themselves in all areas.


When I heard this line, I thought of Doug and how it reminds me of how he has been these days. He is fast becoming the go-to guy for all aspiring quarterbacks in South Florida. His summer camps all sold out, and the demand for private lessons are unbelievable. He loves every minute of it. I am so proud of him. But mostly because he is so passionate about what he is doing. Kids love him and really relate to him. I believe it is because when they are with him they recognize the boy inside of him. To know Doug is to also know the boy who lives in him. The boy who loves to play and seems to have endless energy. The boy who brings fun to everything he does. This same boy has exasperated me on several occasions when I needed/wanted an adult for a husband, but I can never bemoan the boy for long because that rascal is what first caught my eye and then held it for all these years, I hope that boy never succumbs to maturity.

That boy is what makes Doug such a great dad. He loves to have the kind of fun our kids like to have. I always tell people that the babies are mine until they are two. Then they can't help but fall under his spell. He knows what it is like not to be able to sit still. He understands that kids need fresh air and to be silly. He is more forgiving of poor manners like burps and fidgeting because he truly can't help himself either. And he will tease and torture just like an older brother. But no one else is allowed to.

He can be strict, but it is just because he loves his kids so much he doesn't want anything but the best for them.

He can also be so tender, scooping up the girls when they fall asleep and place them on their pillows, covering them gently for the night. Or curling up with them on the couch.

He can drive us crazy with those feet that need constant rubs.


His baths come with a full concert but don't expect hair to be combed or lotion to be applied.

He can never find the ketchup in the fridge. but he always tells me I look pretty.

He does weird things like walking out of the kitchen or bathroom with the faucet running or, constantly losing his wallet, keys, or hats. But he never forgets the important stuff, to hug us, kiss us and make us laugh.

He is not a perfect person, he is the daddy, but we all love every bit of him just the way he is.



Happy Father's Day Daddy

You're #1

What's Happening

The other day I told Doug that I thought our family picture was missing something, or rather someone. He freaked out of course. But now that Monica is cruising all over the house, my heart feels a certain tug. It is only a tug and the truth is I have more than I can handle most days but for that minute I was looking at our picture and knew I could most certainly welcome another baby into our lives. So I was sharing this musing with my sister and she said, "that happened to me too." When her twins were about one she thought about another baby because she felt the hustle of caring for her twins had deprived her of the moments you get when you have just one baby. Moments of just holding one baby, lingering over feedings or late night rockings. Then she told me they turned 2 and that moment felt like it had been a whisper lost in the wind. Her life had been on overdrive for 2 years and she was just barely starting to enjoy the hustle. So she made me promise her to enjoy what I have and give myself some time before jumping head first into another pregnancy. She's so level headed that girl. But I know she is right.

This week at Vacation Bible Camp has been such a blast. The theme has been the Roman Catholic Games in honor of this Olympic year. And each day we have honored a different country with their MVP (Saint). We wrap up tomorrow with a parade of flags and banners. Today, in the Bible lesson, I was so moved by the kids. We did a human decate of the chaplet of Divine Mercy and afterward the normally excitable kids were very calm. Many kids gave me hugs today and thanked me. I felt so much love today my heart was very full. Which made me understand something about myself. I really love kids. I mean I love teaching them, spending time with them, being with them. They are fantastically honest and real. They have such pure hearts and though this week has been exhausting (I've had to be out of the house with everyone in tow by 8:00am) it has been a fantastic time. I have enjoyed sharing our beautiful faith with these kids and I pray that they have had as much fun as I have.

STAYCATION


Do you think I am taking this word marriage thing too far? Well, due to high gas prices which fuel everything I read that many American's are staying home on their summer vacations.....hence a staycation (get it?).
Our staycation this week had plenty of beach time balanced with plenty of lacrosse time, and plenty of reading time. The TV has been turned off during the day which was rough for about 2 hours then the complaining stopped and the real business of summer started with all it's imaginary goodness. Even Ana has been welcomed into Cade and Camryn's world of fake restaurants and plane trips.

I have been using evey nap time to keep up with laundry and my vacation bible camp lessons. Pray for us next week, Last year, since I was pregnant and we were moving, I prepared as best I could under my circumstance but left most to the Holy Spirit and it worked so well that I did the same this year. So needless to say I rely heavily on those prayers especially my own to get me through the week.

I read this interesting post and wanted to share it. I need to be reminded about this constantly. Living a faith life is so much harder than talking about it. But embracing our little crosses in every moment really can be a stronger testomony than anything else we do in service. How much easier it is to complain or throw little pity parties for myself rather than embrace! That's why I love blogging, they inspire and uplift me like a good friend. But that does not replace an actual good friend...sorry Kathleen our conversation had to come to such an abrupt end but my cell phone died and a little elf keeps unplugging it from the charger.

Doug just walked in and demanded I go sit outside with him and finish my coffee. I know it's a hard life I live....

Frienemies


Summer always begins rough for us. Because suddenly the people who are used to a routine find themselves wandering around wondering what to do. And no one seems to like any of my suggestions about organizing or cleaning. So we all find ourselves either enjoying or loathing each other's company. I am hoping the dust settles quick because being a referee is not my bag. I just wish we all could just get along. Doug and I are guilty too. We have a love/hate thing because since he is home I think he should just take over all my usual duties so I can have the summer off. But he says he has "camps" to organize and stuff to do.

Don't get me wrong, it's not all thorns there are rosy sides. We did go to the beach this morning and all the divided parties came together and helped each other build one big hole. And we still eat dinner all around the table together. This is our family, prone to fights and being irritated with each other but will still help each other and come together if need be.

We were at the Dr's office getting all the physicals for next year done and a woman asked me if "they always play so well together" regarding Cade and Camryn who were playing a game of Old Maid in the waiting room. I gave my usual response, "they are the best of friends and the worst of enemies". In the car on the way home Cade remarked, "mom, Camryn and I are Frienemies." He laughed, tickled with himself and his new word.
Frienemies, I think it fits us perfectly.